I have always been a people pleaser… I get myself so wrapped up in making others happy with me that I sometimes lose sight of what is important for me, my marriage, my family, my business, and my friends. Anytime I feel that I have let someone down or that they are upset with me for any reason I become fixated on that. Anyone else a people pleaser?
I have spent years trying to be who everyone else wants me to be. I stress myself out and give myself major anxiety because I am terrified of messing up. I stress eat and lose sleep and beat myself up mentally.
But, I am making a new choice! I am going to start living my life for my own expectations. I am going to choose to be fully myself for the first time ever. I am going to stop allowing other’s perceptions of me dictate my life and my happiness. And I will probably upset some people in the long run. I am sure I will let some people down… but I have to make the decision to live as myself, unapologetically.
Being a people pleaser really just boils down to a deep desire for love. We don’t strive to obsessively please others because it gains us importance, we do it because we believe it will gain us acceptance. I am loved – by the people who matter!
By choosing to stop chasing unhealthy approval, I am allowing myself the chance to find self love and to be so filled with love for others I won’t ever need to seek it out in unhealthy ways again. When I show up for family functions or client meetings—I’m going to be overflowing with love and gratitude and joy! If someone says something or does something that might have affected me negatively once upon a time, now, I won’t even feel it. I don’t need their approval because I approve of myself. I don’t need their love if it comes with conditions. I don’t need to chase love anymore, because I’ve got more than enough here in my heart for everybody.