I have the most amazing partner to travel through life with. My husband is such an incredible man! He is kind and loving, gentle and thoughtful, strong and sweet. I have been so incredibly blessed! His faith and views center me. He calms me when my emotions run rampant. He is my rock.
But, he’s not perfect and neither am I.
I believe that love like this is achievable by everyone. But, I also believe that it takes work.
Our relationship has seen trials and struggles… we certainly have seen times of hurt and anger. We have fought and been mean to each other. We have done things we are not proud of.
The key for us is to love unconditionally and work together to find middle ground. We decided to take divorce off the table before we ever agreed to marrying one another. For us, it is not an option. We have to work together to figure out how to move forward through the tough times. We balance each other out and love one another in spite of our flaws.
I know that in the heat of an argument, it can be difficult to let go or find compromise. But, in order to find happiness and experience incredible love, you must turn your relationship over to God. You must love Him first and above all. You must trust in Him to heal your heart in the pain and open it to the feelings and suffering of the other person. You must take time to listen to God’s message for you in the depths of your heart.
How often do we feel called to hold our ground and be “right” just to keep from admitting our faults or be “wrong”? The need to control the other person and make them submit to our wishes only serves to cause resentment and pain. When this happens repeatedly in the heat of an argument, it builds to a breaking point.
You have to recognize the behavior and change it. When the same “fights” happen time and again, you have to see that the definition of insanity is at play! Your relationship has lost its clarity and you are headed into turmoil and pain.
Thérèse of Lisieux, a young French Carmelite nun of the 19th century, wrote:
My vocation is love! In the heart of the Church, who is my Mother, I will be love. So I shall be everything and so my dreams will be fulfilled — to make Love loved.”
May we be love. May our lives be portraits of love.
Love is such an amazing thing! But, you have to work at it to experience the freedom and happiness it can bring!
I don’t know what I did to deserve such love and happiness.